


What Happened Is Not Right and That's Okay

by StarGirl11



Category: The Owl House (Cartoon)
Genre: Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Canon Disabled Character, Character Study, Child Neglect, Chronic Illness, Chronically Ill Writer, Dehumanization, Disability Abuse, Gaslighting, Gen, I gave up on this being canon compliant, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Inspired by Fanfiction, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pre-Canon, The Clawthornes are not great parents, This is not meant to be Inspo or Tragedy porn, Though they are there to serve what heavier topics appear in a chapter more than anything, character exploration, curse as a metaphor for chronic illness, medical gaslighting, parental neglect, particularly related to eda and her curse but one none the less
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-19
Updated: 2021-02-27
Packaged: 2021-03-15 07:27:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,475
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29555625
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarGirl11/pseuds/StarGirl11
Summary: Living with a curse was never a simple task. And really from day one Eda knew it was going to be complicated. But she can't help but wonder at times. Just why hers has to be this complicated.In short: An Exploration of what life might have been like for Eda growing up with the curse.
Relationships: Eda Clawthorne & Eda Clawthorne's Mother, Eda Clawthorne & Lilith Clawthorne
Comments: 4
Kudos: 17
Collections: Disability in characters





	1. Life Altering Moments

**Author's Note:**

> Before we get into this for anyone clicking here: this is NOT meant to be either inspiration porn or tragedy porn. I am chronically ill myself. I am using this story mainly a personal exploration and partially a sharing of real life ableism. In hopes to get people to better understand the real issues that come with the misconceptions that come with disabilities and chronic illness. 
> 
> The original idea was spun off of this story on Tumblr that's also here on Ao3. Which when reading I realized that there was a good chance Eda had never really been allowed to grieve what the curse had taken from her. And so this fic was born from that originally. It has since expanded to include more topics. But that's how it got started.
> 
> Original fic in question can be found here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29190462
> 
> As of right now, it is canon compliant. Though maybe pre-canon would be a good term also here. That could change admittedly whenever S2 comes out and actually probably will. So that's why I didn't tag it as such.
> 
> Anyways please enjoy.

They say that the biggest moments in your life are the ones you remember the most.

Eda thought that was a load of baloney, personally. 

There had never been a bigger moment in her life than when she first found out someone had cursed her. Something she would really like to think that she would remember happening. 

But she had no clue what had happened. The night before it happened she remembered seeing someone in her room. But she had been too tired to tell who it was. And by the time she woke up they were long gone. 

She wouldn’t even realize that was when it happened for a while. Too much shock to really think about it.

And really even then she didn’t want to think about it. 

That was the moment her life was forever changed. And not exactly for the better. It hurt to think about what could have been if she had maybe been more awake that night. Something that would only get worse as she got older.

And well certain people weren’t exactly helping the situation either. 

* * *

Getting her parents to even accept that something was wrong had been a challenge from the start.

First off, there had been disbelief that it had even been a curse, to begin with.

Eda wasn’t entirely sure she had known it was a curse from the beginning. Maybe it was from her own hijinks. Or maybe it was her own love of reading up on mysterious magic when she could get her hands on them. 

But somehow she had known it wasn’t just a silly spell.

Though that hadn’t meant she hadn’t allowed herself to be lulled into a false sense of security for a bit. 

It wouldn’t be the last time she would let her parents lull her into it. Thinking they must know best on this. After all, look at what they had seen before Belos had come into power.

The next year would turn that idea completely on its head. And break most of her trust in her parents and in healers but she didn’t know that when it first started. Back then things had been a lot of simpler.

Back then, she hadn’t even begun to realize the amount of issues her family had.

So when her mother had scoffed at the idea. “Don’t be ridiculous Edalyn. If you had been cursed you would know it. It must have been a transformation spell gone awry.”

Eda had tried to take it seriously. No matter how much lingering doubt there was in the back of her mind. “But why would someone do it then?”   
  
Sure she pranked people. But she had always been pretty indiscriminate on that. If you went to Hexside you could be pranked by her. It didn’t matter who you were

Had she really done something worthy of being transformed in front of the whole school and the Emperor’s Coven?

Her mother gave her a pointed look at the question. “Some people have no respect for the time and place. You of all witchlings would know that Edalyn.”

Well if that wasn’t a shot at her hijinks over the years Eda didn’t know what was.

“Just because a duel for one of the most coveted spots on the isles should be treated with respect, doesn’t mean that everyone will. Someone most likely thought it would be a good form of retribution for all of your actions over the years.”

It was really hard not to miss the ‘and its about time’ lingering in the statement from her mother. But Eda tried to ignore it.

* * *

There had been only one person who had believed her in those early days. In a moment of irony that she would only begin to understand when she was much older. After a spur of the moment confession from her, It had been Lilith. 

Though even that wasn’t entirely true. Yes, Lilith in those early days had believed Eda was cursed. But it wasn’t until the second transformation had occurred that Lilith had thought it was more than a temporary thing. 

“I don’t even get why someone want to curse me in the first place.” 

Lilith was packing up her things. She would be moving out the following day. Training for the Emperor’s Coven would begin at the start of the next week, bright and early. And at least in the beginning with all the time and effort involved in the coven she simply wouldn’t have time to come home. 

So it would be the last chance they would get to talk.

“I mean I get I prank people. But cursing feels a bit extreme ya know.”

Lilith hummed in thought. “It does feel like an overreaction. However, what makes you think it was from the pranking?”

Eda shrugged. “I don’t know, I guess to me it makes the most sense? I can’t think of anything really over the top I could have done besides that.”

The reaction was over the top as it was. Cursing someone for playing a prank? It wasn’t like she had hurt anyone in the past. Caused a few messes, sure. But if things looked like they were going too far she always stepped in.

No matter how much trouble she might get in. 

She guessed that made it more probable it was what mother had said. 

But Eda had been transformed before both by other students and in her own messing around with magic. She had it happen enough that she knew what the experience was, usually. This was nothing like what usually happened.

“Look I just know I remember stuff when it's a transformation spell. I don’t remember anything after I started walking away from you. If this is a transformation spell it's not like any other one I’ve seen.” 

Lilith looked surprised. “Not a thing?”

“No, one minute I’m walking away from the duel. The next thing I remember is coming to my senses. Hurting in all sorts of weird places. And you panicking over something. Everything between them is a giant blank.”

“That is unusual.” Lilith agreed. 

“Look I just know that while I want it to be nothing more than a transformation spell. I can’t shake this feeling that there is more than that going on. You believe me,  _ right? _ ”

“Yes. Though I am not convinced it's more than a one time thing.”

Eda frowned at that. “But most curses are, Lily, unless they can easily be broken. And those are the rarest of them all.” She really didn’t understand her sister’s hangup on it being scarier than she kept trying to make it out to be. 

“True.” Lilith looked lost in thought for a moment. “Look, for now I agree with you that this seems to be more than just a transformation spell. But let’s not try to worry too much about it unless it happens again. It’s going to do none of us any good to ponder for the moment. Not until we know more.”

Eda bit back a retort. She knew full well that curses were easier treated when caught early. But it was quite apparent that no one was going to listen to her fully on this.

A fact that would only get more frustrating in years to come. 

Eda was brought out of her thoughts as Lilith said. “But Eda, regardless of what this is,  _ promise me  _ you’ll call if it happens again, okay.”

Eda nodded. “Of course.”

Though if it happened again Eda thought that would be the least of her problems. 


	2. Reality Sets In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eda transforms for a second time and reactions to this might not being a one off thing vary wildly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Dehuminization, parental neglect, and medical neglect.
> 
> AN: Hey there so what story is basically what it says on the tin. With some creative liberty of course.
> 
> Something to keep in mind is that this story progresses:  
> 1\. Explore Eda's character and others in response to the curse  
> 2\. Help myself explore and come to terms with my own Chronic Illness  
> 3\. Help educate others who aren't as familiar with disabilities on the realities of the situation. This one is important to me since the fandom can have an ableism issue. And I would like for readers to maybe take away why the use of certain tropes is a lot worse than they might realize.  
> 4\. This story is not meant to be either tragedy or inspiration porn.  
> 5\. I've only really begun interacting with the disability community in the last few years. So if I do a misstep its unintentional ignorance. Which I realize is not great either. I just want to make clear my intent is not malicious. If someone else who is in the community in some form be it Neurotypical, disabled, chronically ill, etc. sees something questionable within the story that comes off as unintentionally ableist please tell me. I would be happy to clarify if the plot beat was unintentional (and fix it) or somehow deals with the story itself. Which will happen sometimes.  
> 6\. Some of this is based on my own experience. Some of it is not. The parents issue this chapter is a good example of it not being based on my own experience. 
> 
> This story will touch on some topics that might be sensitive to some readers. I will include warnings . If your sensitive to the topic please keep that in mind before starting it. Also please bear in mind that not all chapters will have the same element. So while one chapter might have one issue, the other might not. A good example of this is an arc I will be exploring later in the story involving ableism in sports. 
> 
> Anyways Actual story is under the read more. Ao3 link is at the top. Please let me know what you think!

One day turned into two and two turned quickly into a week. And after that with no real sign of the ‘curse’ resurfacing, Eda had actually started to think that maybe everyone else was right.

Maybe whatever had happened that day was just a one off thing. 

Unfortunately, reality had made that hope come crashing down just over two weeks after “the duel that wasn’t” with Lilith.

* * *

Eda wouldn’t remember the moment that would properly change everything about her life.

Though, she guessed that wasn’t entirely accurate. Considering the biggest moment had happened a week prior was when she had been supposed to be vying for an Emperor’s Coven spot against Lily. The day of her first transformation.

However the incident in potions class, the moment they now knew this was almost certainly not just a one off incident like they had been hoping? That was the moment it became all too real for Eda. 

Even if it would be a while longer before it became real for the _rest_ of the family. That was the day reality started to sink in for Eda. As it was the day that she knew at least to an extent that her life wasn’t going to ever be the same.

It would also be her first gateway into the many, many issues that came with the curse. Whether it be other people’s treatment of her cursed form, right or wrong, or just still having people take her seriously in the beginning. 

Something that would be a recurring struggle she would have to deal with in the coming years.

Much like the duel, she would only be told what had happened afterward. The entire time she was transformed she wasn’t even aware of what was going on. 

It was something that would over time become associated with fear and worry. At the time though, for an Eda who was still in denial, it was more of a source of annoyance. 

Eda didn’t like that she had to rely on other people to necessarily do ‘the right thing’. Especially since in both instances so far it nearly hadn’t ended in her favor.

Thankfully of all people it was apparently _Principle Bump_ who came to her rescue. Seeing reason when one of the other teachers had tried to suggest handing her off to the head of the Beast Keeping classes for the time being... 

Bump scowled at that not particularly liking the way this conversation was going, “She is still a student. A transformed one but one nonetheless. Unless she starts attacking someone there is no reason to be summoning Arden.”

Sure, he may not be particularly fond of Eda’s antics at times. Sometimes he wished that the entire Clawthorne dynamic wasn’t like how it was. It was a source of many of his headaches.

But that did not mean he supported putting Eda in a cage.

Even if she wasn’t in her right mind currently, she was still a student. And she wasn’t being aggressive. Honestly, this other form so far hasn't been aggressive at all. Though who was to say that wouldn’t change?

He was more than a bit concerned with how little they knew. However, there was one thing he was certain on: that forcing her into a cage would make things worse, not better.

Not that he particularly liked the idea even before you factored in the fact that they’d be caging a student.

“So what do you suggest we do with her then, sir? Leaving her out could cause property damage.”

Which, arguably, was more Eda than anything else. 

“Put her in my office and call a healer. Hopefully someone will know what to do to get her to transform back.”

“Sir, I must protest. Putting her with you could put you-”

Bump cut the other teacher off before he could continue. “I didn’t become the principal of this institution by sitting on my thumbs Marcus. I am more than capable of handling an unruly student. Even if she has been transformed into another creature.”

Not that he genuinely thought handling would be an issue.

* * *

“So what your saying is neither of you can help.”

Bump had ended up summoning both a healer and grabbing DeFrost anyway. Hoping maybe one of them would know how to solve their issue. 

“I apologize, sir. But I’m used to dealing with minor curses. Things of inconvenience mostly. Under normal circumstances, I would refer this student to a specialist. This is way beyond my own capabilities to treat.”

And of course, they couldn’t do that without involving the Clawthorne parents. Who he had tried to alert when Edalyn had transformed again. But they had both been busy and he had yet to hear anything from them yet.

“And I’ve never seen a creature quite like this. Cursed or otherwise. I could possibly see if I have anything discussing something similar to Ms. Clawthorne. However...”

“Most likely Edalyn will have transformed back by then.” Bump concluded.

So apparently they were dealing with not just a curse. But a rare curse. Great. 

Why was it that nothing involving the Clawthornes was just plain and simple?

“At the very least can you tell me if she’s any sort of danger?”

That way he could have his staff stop bothering him.

DeFrost adjusted their glasses. “Well it's hard to say without knowing the curse or how it impacts her mind. But based on normal cursed creature behavior most likely she won’t be a danger to anyone unless she’s provoked. However there’s still a lot of questions there...”

“Like what could provoke her.”

“Exactly.” DeFrost nodded. “Sir, I know you said you could handle if anything happened but-”

“I can handle myself just fine Arden. I appreciate your concern but if I need your help again I will ask for it.”

“Understood sir.” DeFrost agreed reluctantly. Before taking their leave.

“Am I dismissed as well sir?”

“No. Actually I wanted to ask. I know you can’t help her return to normal. But I imagine the transformation back won’t be easy on her. Is there anything we can do to ease that at least?”

“Well yes. But that would normally involve the family…”

“I’ll handle anything that might come if they protest. This is already a difficult time for Edalyn. Let's not make it worse.”

* * *

Thankfully time really was all they needed for Eda to transform back. 

Though rather than answering his questions and possible suspicions. Eda’s return to awareness just raised even more of them in their steed.

“Welcome back Edalyn. How are you feeling?”

“Like an icicle is trying to drive a hole into my skull,” Eda said, wincing again rubbing the right side of her head. “What happened?” 

“I believe that you will probably want this, then.” Bump rather than answer the question slid the potion that the healer had left for Eda when she finally returned to normal. “The healers figured you might have one after you transformed back.” Bump explained as Eda downed the bottle.

Eda frowned as she put the bottle down again. Now that the pain was receding she could think a bit more clearly. And realize that she couldn’t think of a reason for why she would be in the office in the first place. “Back? Wait was I-”

“Transformed into that creature from the duel? Yes.”

“I didn’t even realize it,” Eda noted with a frown. Much like the last time everything was just a giant blank from right before she transformed. Which worried her on another level. Why was she unable to remember anything from when the spell, curse, whatever it was took effect?. “I didn’t hurt anyone did I?” 

“No everyone got out of your minor escapade without a scratch.” Bump assured her. Deciding to leave off the near incident with DeFrost and the cages for the moment. It wasn’t like he hadn’t specifically told them not to get the Beast Keeping professor involved. 

Eda sighed in relief. “That’s good at least.” 

“So you really aren’t aware of what happened after you transformed? I take it?”

“No, the last thing I remember is being in the potions classroom. And then waking up here. Everything between the two is a blank.” Eda’s face scrunched up in a frown. There was a bit of a tangible residue of some sort of memory. But she still didn’t know the relevance of it. “Mother’s going to kill me for missing class.”

“I would have thought you might be somewhat pleased by the new attention.”

After all that had been a reason behind some of Eda’s pranks over the years. Though sometimes Bump wondered just how much Eda realized this herself.

“Not like this.”

“Either way I’ll write a note. In the meantime you really should have a specialist check you.”

Eda winced. “That’s probably going to be easier said than done.” 

“If it comes to it, the same offer I made to your sister when she was being given difficulty by them I’ll extend to you. If you need someone to help you get seen about this curse then I can try to help you find someone that your parents won’t cause problems with.”

Eda winced remembering the fiasco that had been trying to get her sister her glasses. There was an unfortunate high probability history could repeat itself. She really hoped her parents had maybe learned. “I’ll keep that in mind, thank you Principal Bump.”

“Your welcome.”

Eda’s unusual politeness wasn’t lost on him. Go figure the most polite conversation he had ever had with Edalyn was because of a curse.

Maybe he should have tried a different tactic with the youngest Clawthorne?

Too late to fix that now he supposed.

* * *

Any small hope for Eda that maybe her parents would take it seriously when she got home. And not try to toss it again under ‘something else’ didn’t last longer than five minutes after her mother got home. 

“Clawthornes don’t get cursed.”

“But-” Eda began to try and protest. Absentmindedly scratching her wrists. While most of the pain had subsided with the potion Bump had given her, there were still some residual aches and pains from the transformation.

Just like last time in fact. 

“End of discussion. I will not entertain this absolutely absurd discussion. Let alone the idea of taking you to a specialist.”

Eda scowled, not ready to back down without a fight. “If it's just a spell then why did it happen a second time?”

“I don’t know Edalyn, maybe someone thought they should continue the lesson.”

Eda opened her mouth to try and continue the argument. Only to have her mother disappear through the door, slamming it shut behind her. 

“But I haven’t even done anything this past week.” Eda muttered to herself.

After the first idea of it being a curse had gotten into her head. She had decided to try and be better. The transformation had hurt! She hadn’t wanted to go through it again. 

So as difficult as it had been she had hung up her pranking supplies. For now at least until whoever was angry with her cooled down.

If this really was because of a prank. Then someone was really vindictive was all she could say.

Either way whatever caused it wasn’t really the problem anymore. It was figuring out what to do next before the curse resurfaced a third time. 

Normally she would have turned to Lily for guidance. But her sister was away at training. Meaning it was her against her parents. And she had no clue how to handle it from there. 

It had always been them against the world. Even when that _world_ sometimes included their own parents. 

With the one person who may have understood their complex family dynamic gone. With her having no idea when she would see Lily again. She had no one to turn to. 

Sure, Bump had once said that if she needed help to come to him. But this felt like a bit of a reach. 

Maybe it was for the best to leave it alone for now. Maybe if it happened again her parents would take it seriously.

She knew that the likelihood of that happening was probably small, but what else could she even do at this point?

Her parents' reaction, while infuriating, was not entirely unexpected. And it was even less likely to change if her childhood was anything to go by. Since, if it was something that made the Clawthorne’s imperfect, then it was not to be acknowledged. Even if it impacted their own children. 

And if there was anything that indicated an ‘imperfection’ it was having a curse on a child. 

Titan knew how it had been a fight to get Lily her glasses. Eda couldn’t even begin to imagine how complicated things might be if this was something far more sinister than getting your sight corrected.

She guessed if she needed too she could try looking for care on her own. She was old enough now that she didn’t _need_ her parents there at a healer’s appointment. But then again the fall out from going to a doctor when she didn’t have her own source of income.

Well it would be a mess. 

Why did this have to be so complicated?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's a wrap for today.
> 
> Only significant thing to note right now. Is I am going to try and go to a once a week posting schedule. And when I say that I don't mean necessarily this fic. I mean once a week I will update one of my active projects. That could be LNGL, this story, or Light of the Holiday. It depends on what is currently ready and finished. 
> 
> Both LNGL and LotH's chapters are actually fairly close to being done. So one of them will go up next week. I am just not sure which. 
> 
> Anyway that's it for now. Please remember to leave a comment or a kudos on the way out.

**Author's Note:**

> And that's a wrap. 
> 
> I don't know how often these will be getting out. This story is a lot more personal to me when compared to my normal works. Since this is also a bit of self exploration on my end. And so it takes a bit more personal energy to right then my other stories.
> 
> Length for chapters is probably going to be around here if a bit longer? I am trying to keep the chapters focused around a central element (ie this chapter was about first reactions) . So there's not a point in over exploring there and thus getting really long chapters. Hopefully. I am trying to find a better balance between too long and too short of a chapter. 
> 
> Oh and since I have a feeling this will get asked. Eda is 14 and Lilith is 16/17 at the start of this. It will be a while before we get to present day Owl House. Though that is the plan. But it will be a while before we get to the canon S1 story.
> 
> Anyways please let me know what you think! Leave a comment or kudos.


End file.
